double standards #2

I was talking to a saudi girl who lives in the US .. about how do saudi guys role there .. I’m not the one to talk or judge actually coz I still live here in jeddah .. but I hear stories and know people who tried living abroad .. first of all .. when they first start studying english in whatever institute .. they usually find spanish/Brazilian/turkish girls .. who are tall ,beautiful , fun and open minded who don’t mind going out with them on dates or even invite them to parties .. this girl was telling me about the saudi guys in her school who spend all their time with these foreign girls .. dating or partying or just hanging out .. i’m not judging .. it’s their choice to live this kinda life .. and I don’t see anything wrong with it .. on the contrary , I believe it’s good to widen our horizon to different cultures .. but what pisses me off is when they sit next to a saudi girl in their class , they have this unexplained  behaviour , it’s like testing her , what kinda girl is she? , oh and if she’s wearing hijab , it kinda intimidates them , they start talking to her and see how would she react , if she’s friendly and open then she’s in the black list !! or they would call her ( 5afeefa ) , and if she’s pretending to not talk to them then she’s a decent person , judgmental !!! they go to their homes and blabber about the morals and behaviour and the WARDROBE ! of each and every saudi girl in their class .. while leaving the turkish girl who wears mini skirts and they’re dating off the hook .. why is that ?? she’s saudi , she should stay at home and not talk to anyone ..

another issue she raised is that they go to the other guys .. let’s say a spanish guy .. and tell him ” hey man , keep your distance from the saudi girl , and be cautious how to deal with her ” seriously man !!!! .. what kinda mentality is that .. the girl kept telling me how they pretend to defend the saudi girls’ honor while they are the ones ruining their reputation .. of course gossips would spread like plague about anything a saudi girl does .. she went to a night club !!! wow .. while HE was there and this is how he caught her there .. but hey ! he has the green light .. the guy goes to a night club it’s okay .. if a girl did it she’s a b**** .. while it’s all the same .. if the guy think it’s wrong then he shouldn’t go there in the first place .. a saudi girl wore shorts .. a saudi girl was caught riding a bicycle .. a saudi girl went out with a spanish guy .. a saudi girl went to the beach .. a saudi girl did this and wore that .. she’s under surveillance 24/7 and judging eyes would be following her everywhere especially single girls !! married girls are off the hook .. she does whatever she wants .. it’s ok she has a husband .. is having a husband an immunity to the stupid gossips ?? well all I have to say regarding that matter .. leave the girls alone and let them live their lives the way they want .. just the way you guys are living it !! and stop judging them !!

double standards #1

Here I am writing these series of posts that I’m not sure I should write it down .. but it’s the truth and it has to go out to the public .. I know that the readers are either going to love what I’m going to write , or they are going to hate me for exposing what they are doing and they think it’s the right thing to do .. I have been living here in Saudi Arabia for 25 years , my beautiful country , I love it , and I got used to the situation here .. but there are some wrong concepts going around that really annoys me and I need to let it out ..

double standards … mmm… double ? so it’s people just living two different lives .. being two persons in one .. and most of these personalities develop after they are raised in the typical saudi traditional way .. where they think everything is wrong .. a girl exposing her face , wow she’s a sinner!! .. a girl who’s not wearing a scarf because she’s not committed to hijab , that’s a bigger sinner too !!.. a girl talking to a guy , damn she’s going to hell !!.. the only contact they get with a girl is through the phone after he chases her so she can take his phone number , and after she calls him , she’s in the black list of the bad girls .. that’s extremists .. and alot of people are raised in that way ..throughout their childhood and their teenage years .. They grow up one day .. and need to continue their education abroad ..and voila !! At first ,they get cultural shock from the new society they have to deal with .. they start looking at a different world .. different people .. more open society .. Where there’s no red lines and restrictions .. Where you have the freedom to do whatever you want .. where everyone talks to everyone .. people are talking easily and laughing with strangers which is very weird for their upbringing .. talking to a strange girl without anyone judging them , or being afraid of what would she think if I talked to her , or is it socially acceptable? .. they start loving the attention of girls , enjoying their company , which they never tried in their life back in saudi .. and a normal male to female attraction may develop .. so they start loving this new kind of life .. Some may go to the extreme , and the others may just collect as many female friends as possible .. Just to enjoy their time while they are there .. They don’t know how does this male/female friendship goes .. So they get mixed up and there’s always consequences and complications with Saudi people pretending to be FRIENDS!! .. Either the girl or the guy ruin the friendship by developing feelings and start asking for more .. I have met some girls who don’t believe in male / female friendship , she believes it doesn’t exist , they have to end up married eventually or they end it up for good and not contact each other anymore .. Another example , a friend of a friend once was saying ” there’s nothing as pure friendship between a guy and a girl here in Saudi Arabia , there’s always attraction no matter how much they resist it” ..
My next question is ” Is an American / british / australian …. Etc .. female friend different than a Saudi female friend??” of course !!!
I’m not yet done that’s just my first post explaining how did it all start !!

shattered !!

Where are we now?? .. but the question is who are “we”? .. I’ve been asking myself lately this question because “we” used to be my group of girls in college .. we were ten .. and now? I’m trying to keep track of these ten people who used to spend 10 hours or more together every single day .. well i’m trying to keep track of them .. and we’re still in contact .. but things are somehow different now .

I may mention some details in this post without names .. well i’m sure all the girls involved are going to recognize each and every person i’m writing about !!

So it was one thursday morning , two years ago , two years!! that’s such a long time and it passed by so quickly .. we were all gathered in one of our friend’s place , and we were having “THE breakfast” , I don’t know why but that day was a memorable day , I will never forget it , eventhough it was just a breakfast where everyone got their own dish , basbosa and foool ( maybe that will ring a bell ) lol .. it was a happy day , full of joy and laughter despite the fact that it was supposed to be a studying day .. such moments that left a special imprint in my memory  will always be there ..

At that day , we all had one goal , one purpose , is to finish our senior year with high Gpa , we were all studying to achieve that at the moment .. after that year has passed .. what’s next? too many options were there .

Marriage is a phase in every girl’s life , we shared the happiness of the wedding parties for each  , but did we realize it was a big turn around point in her life? yes it was a turning point for her and for us to accept this change .. she’s starting her own family .. now three of them already have their own small beautiful family , the fourth is on the way now .. sometimes I envy what they have because I believe it’s the most amazing feeling in the world .. and yes marriage may alter your life plan , it becomes a shared plan of two people instead of your own plan , some had to move to Riyadh , or a place called khafgy – an oil rank- , or to the US according to their husbands circumstances.

Life is strange , it takes us to different places , each and every year , it changes , to the better ? or to the worse? or maybe it remains the at the same rhythm  . After graduation and finishing our internship year , each and everyone of us was searching for her path , each had her own plans , some took the academic path , some went to work in the clinical field , that’s the path that has worked out for me , and some are starting their post- grad studies in a month here .Although we’re in the same city , but still somehow we’re scattered in different places . The ones who already left the country , already started their first steps to their post -grad studies . I just pray to god everyday , to bless us all wherever we are ..

well that’s life , our paths that has crossed during our college years has reached an end , we are now shattered , each is following her path that allah has chosen for her )

searching for??

A questions that we all ask ourselves .. what are we searching for ? what’s next? .. At a certain point of your life you tend to put goals and set your plan accordingly  .. what if this goal is reached ? we keep wondering what’s ahead .. we start setting new goals and dreams to pursue .. but there’s always obstacles .. or a complete change of direction of where you thought you were heading .. last year I was definite that by this time I would be living my own independent life , away from here , from everyone , from my old life . A new start , a new life , a new place . I’ve been dreaming and dreaming constantly ,but eventually I wake up with the slap of reality . I’m Kind of living in the same situation , the only thing that has changed is my work place , the destination of my usual car trip everyday , but the routine is pretty much the same . “Routine” a word that has a very boring sound .. doing the same thing , again and again on daily basis . Breaking it is a must . I have reached a point where I don’t see myself working as a dentist fulfilling anymore , maybe it’s not enough for me , I know I’ve got a long road ahead of me ,and I’m gonna reach there with determination and patience . Alternative plan? well everything has already changed , and whatever happens I should just go with the flow with a smile across my face , accepting my destiny and the path god has chosen for me . Eventually on the long run , I will reach where I want but while I’m trying to enjoy every moment of it instead of whining , and spreading positive energy around. Life is too short , live , love and laugh =D

asking myself what am I searching for?? I’m not sure yet ….

when are we gonna grow up?

An incident happened a few days back .. it was one afternoon .. i logged online and of course directly to facebook.com =p lol .. and here I am typing my username and password .. and taadaaaa !!.. an error message saying my email is not registered in the website .. I thought I was dizzy since it has been a long day .. I re-typed again and again and again!! well surprise !! my account has been hacked :S … and now what?? I tried to inform everyone I can contact through the phone and blackberry .. but hey I cant reach 300 and so people … i asked everyone to report and that’s everything I could do ..  I thought his purpose was to steal the pictures .. but no he’s impersonating me now .. and adding as much girls as he can ..random girls I don’t even know ..  and some poor victims of such a twisted psycho are accepting his request thinking it’s me .. and I’ve seen some wall posts thanking me for the add and welcoming me to their list .. I’m seriously confused of what am I supposed to do now … I tried to send as much reports as possible but still facebook didn’t shut off the account .. I never imagined that such people exist .. for god’s sake we’re in the 20th century .. and they are still acting like we’re in the 19th century .. I have been surrounded around well educated and decent people that I forgot about the existence  of  such twisted and psychos ..

dear sick hacker ,

and i’m saying when are we gonna grow out of this bull**** ?? people all over the world are advancing and moving forward .. growing bigger everyday .. and we are still stuck in this stupid mentality .. please god help me tolerate this

 

yours,

an angry woman whose facebook account has been hacked

 

celebrating new year’s eve !!

I have took a trip to visit my brother  who’s been living in the US for quite a time now .. he’s  been living in florida .. well I thought i should invest my unemployed period of time ..  it’s a golden opportunity that I don’t think I’ll ever have again lol .. so I took some time away from reality .. I’ve been living in my own world .. like normal people with no jobs do .. relaxed and no worries .. Just going out , shopping , shopping and shopping lol .. they say shop till you drop =p ..

how do I usually spend my new year’s eve? mm…. let me think , stay at home , sleep and wake up like it’s any normal day lool .. I have always seen the world’s celebrations for the new year .. last night was my  first time to actually witness it live .. we went to the down town .. all I could see is a verry huge crowd of people .. walking around , laughing  and having a good time .. they were all wearing these colored , glittering hats , headbands that reads ” happy new year” , colored lightening  glasses shaped as 2011 .. which I got one btw lol .. and I love it =D .. I have been wearing it all night .. there was a rock band .. and another band .. all available for the public .. at 12 am they started the countdown ..  5 … 4 … 3 … 2 …. 1 !!!!!! and booom the fireworks started .. it was magnificent with all the colors and shapes .. and people started screaming .. the weather was amazing .. it was all overwhelming , I came home feeling content and happy .. with a smile on my face before I go to bed ..

let’s just hope this year 2011 brings out the best .. and i’m wishing for something good to happen in my life

a french racist ..

a weird thing I discovered about french people .. I haven’t gone to france for a long time .. unless we were with a tour group of the cruise .. well this time we stayed for a good period of time .. few weeks back at the mid term vacation .. it was 10 days !! .. well what I discovered was somehow shocking to me but it seems everyone was like ( yeah that’s very well known !! how can you not know this? ) lol ..

1st of all .. french people are arrogant and super RUDE .. especially when you approach them and start speaking in any language other than their precious language .. even english .. that’s supposedly an international language that everyone speaks nowadays .. and you don’t see friendly people walking around the streets , smiling or waving at you .. or help you if you’re a stupid lost tourist lol and have no what’s so ever clue where to go ..

two stupid incidents happened to us there .. they charged us double in the rental apartment that dad reserved online .. they took their fees full before we arrive and then afterwards again!! .. and at a tourists attraction that’s called (sacre couere ) translated as the sacred heart .. anyways my story is that we were in a souvenir shop and mom was changing her hat .. someone grabbed that opportunity while her purse was wide open and took her wallet .. it had over 2000 euros .. and the shocking thing is that they were the people working in the shop illegally  .. so we called  the police .. and the police guy is a stupid racist french who didn’t do anything coz the men who took the wallets ran away .. and our money is gone .. they just told us to go to the station and report it  .. what the hell ??

and french guys are really ugly .. you don’t find hot guys roaming around like in italy =p loool

I think i’m done for today lol * sighs*

a new fresh start ..

a new life style .. it’s like my whole life has turned upside down .. I wake up whenever I want , I stay up late if I want to , I can go out everyday .. Living a stress-free life ..travelling around any time of the year regardless of the vacation and school ..  well I AM LIVING IT!! .. I finally realized when people say life is good .. I see my former colleagues already started working .. starting the same dull routine which is waking up at the same time and going to the same place every single day .. come back home exhausted then sit around for a while and sleep .. the next day is pretty much the same .. I can envy them because of their bank account that’s increasing unlike me lol .. and the ones who are still unemployed are complaining from boredom ?? .. my message to them is GUYS JUST ENJOY IT !! ..

wearing a social mask ..

well let’s say we’re in a social gathering .. a conversation would go this way ..

“ahleen .. how are you doing? “

*kisses on both cheeks* this is a necessity

“i’m good .. how’s everything? “

“everything’s fine .. oh my god it’s been a long time .. zamaan 3annik “

” yeah zaman 3annik enty kaman .. we have to meet esh da “

” 5alas i’ll give you a call and we have to arrange with the girls to meet up “

” yeah sure lazim  ”

this is for a group of girls

let’s assume she’s on old woman ..

“keefek ya 5ala ?? esh a5barik “

“hamdilla ya benty ana b5eer .. kaif ommik wo abooki ? “

” they are fine “

” salemeeli 3aleehom “

” enshalla ya 5ala “

” mashalla ya benty keberty .. haa et5a6abty wala la2 ? ” —> the most common question :p

this is how a normal conversation would start with people you know .. i’m not talking about close friends .. let’s say it’s social networking

of course in these gatherings we would be dressed up from head to toe .. pretending to be enjoying your time .. nodding at every comment and keeping a fake smile on your face .. some people are really good at these events and they would have the spot light .. everyone will be saying she’s a sweet girl and she’s so cute .. but is this who we really are ?

well everyone would try to pull this same act but are they the same in their homes? with their family? and best friends? people tend to act different in each place according to the situation .. at work .. at home .. at gatherings .. at the beach .. i just hate this social mask I have to wear everywhere I go :S .. it’s very exhausting and needs a lot of effort lol

when all doors closes ..

one of my favorite quotes that I have always believed in ” when a door closes , another one opens , but we are too distracted staring at the closed one that we don’t see the open one behind us ” .. This is what I have been trying to tell myself these days .. because of some reason everything seems to go the other way around .. I have plans but it always gets ruined and I have to shift to plan B , C or even D .. I believe eventually everything will turn out to be just fine .. everyone has something to go back to now after the vacation .. wether it’s their job or school or college.. the question i’ve been asking myself now is what do I want to do ? .. and I can’t even answer that .. I need to find a purpose to fulfill my empty life .. I can choose to do regular things that normal people do .. like go shopping , or to the beach , or the gym .. but then what? will I satisfy my existence .. will it be enough .. and for how long will I be doing so? .. I have so many postponed plans like the photography course that I have been talking to my friends about since I got the proffesional camera and never really knew how to use it properly lol .. I had plans to go back to my piano lessons , I have stopped playing 3 years ago and I have been playing since i was nine .. I think it’s a waste if I lost my talent .. and I promised myself that I need to be good in photoshop which I suck at .. now that I have all the free time in the world .. I’m not doing any of these plans .. is it a mistake that I enrolled in such a college and chose to be a doctor in the first place?? .. and I’m such an idiot for being a crazy workaholic who can’t survive without work .. lol ..

p.s. I think I’m losing my mind lol